A recurring theme with my single friends is, “I just want a man who is more manly than I am.” In a culture where women have become hyper independent and capable we don’t “need” men like we used to.
One example, my friend can see something and go, “I could make that” and then she does. She has made an elaborate porch swing, crates/boxes, chicken coops and more. Another friend said, “Car maintenance? I can do that…” And she changes her own oil, headlights, taillights, bumper issues, etc… Another friend says, “I need to do ______, I will pay for it.” And she takes on extra jobs until she has what she needs to finance her plans.
MY mindset on this is… “I will ask my dad… or my brother… or my other brother… or my friend at church…” I don’t like boy jobs. Even if I know how to do them. I LIKE that men will carry heavy things and open doors and change my oil. But I have a luxury that many of my friends don’t. And that is having male relatives who still very much take care of me and don’t make me feel like a burden to them. Even when I am being one.
I guess my problem is more, “I need a man who can outman my dad…” while my friends need a man who will outman them. (It doesn’t take much to outman me.)
This is not a post to hate men. I’m not about that. I DO think that people need to have it explained to them though… Women care less about how tall, fit, handsome he is at the end of the day and are more like… “Does he love the Lord, can he provide, is he kind, can I stand to be around him, can he make me laugh, will he support me through life’s ups and downs, will he be good to my family, is he emotionally intelligent?” Then we can get more nitpicky, “Do I feel feminine around him? Can I trust his choices? Will he make choices that are best for me? Is the beard here to stay? Does he want kids? Will he till another garden bed no questions asked? Will he let me have a milk cow? Will he work two jobs so I can stay home with our kids? What are his vices?” THEN we can decide if things like height are actually non-negotiable.
Like, I am tall. I prefer taller men because it makes me feel more feminine. BUT… if Christian Jack Black were to walk into a room, I wouldn’t care about height so much…
Redheaded Jill 
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